Thursday, October 26, 2006
Elizabeth Trever Buchinger
When I was a small child, I had this horrific notion that haunted me every night at bedtime.
As my mother would kiss my forehead and turn toward the door, my heart would begin to pound.
By the time she would turn out my light and bid me goodnight as a silhouette in the doorway, my heart
would be in my throat.
The cause? A roaming disembodied eyeball that scoured the country, peering into
darkened windows in search of little girls who were attempting to push the boundaries of respectable bedtimes.
In other words, The Eye was looking for little girls just like me.
Who knows what planted in my
imagination the seed that flowered into the stuff of nightmares.
Maybe my father _ a sci-fi buff of the
first order _ allowed me at too young an age to watch "War of the Worlds," with its terrifying cyclops spaceships.
That couldn’t have helped.
Maybe I was a little preschool civil libertarian, fearing a day when
unchecked powers might extend tentacles of unethical surveillance into every corner of citizens’ lives, even
little girls’ bedtimes.
Or maybe I was just a normal kid with the normal capacity for scaring myself
silly. There is a reason, after all, that Halloween, with all its chills and frights, is a holiday for children.
Compared with children, the rest of us are mere pretenders in the world of fear. Oh sure, we have worries.
We worry about illness, maybe. We fear that we have not prepared well enough for winter. We’re afraid of
bankruptcy and Alzheimer’s disease.
We think we know fear. But we don’t know anything like a
child’s fear.
Just last week, my daughter and I were reading a new book in which Dora (the explorer!)
is agonizing over the crucial choice of a Halloween costume. My daughter is three; we know that particular agony.
On one page, Dora receives a pointy witch hat from a scarecrow, and my daughter informed me that she doesn’t
like scarecrows one little bit.
"Why?" I asked.
"Because they’re sceery and they wave around and
they flap outside my window!"
Scarecrows. Flapping outside the window!
Are you kidding me? That’s
some seriously scary stuff. It may be even scarier than a bedtime-enforcing eyeball. I won’t lie; I pulled the
curtains a little tighter that night.
Fear must have been stewing in her little head that night, because the next
morning she relayed a nightmare to me.
"There were underpants in the potty. And a SHARK? ATE. Them."
(It’s okay to shiver and hug yourself a bit. I won’t tell anyone. And if you feel like you need to
bring a tire iron into the bathroom with you the next time you go, it’ll be our secret.)
So children have
a natural talent for fear.
Thank goodness they also get Halloween. One night of the year, they get to put on
their scariest faces and drive all those scarecrows and toilet sharks shrieking into the darkness.
Or maybe they
put on their funniest faces and turn all their fears into belly laughs.
Or, like my daughter, maybe they put on
their most sparkly ballerina outfits and turn their darkest nightmares into a starlit stage.
Come to think of it,
we can all use a little Halloween.
Elizabeth Trever Buchinger is a freelance writer who’s going to be a
princess- no, a vampire _ no, a pirate.
She can be reached at VillageWordsmith@hughes.net.
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